The Trendy #LtDan

Undisclosed location, US Navy Special Warfare

March 20, 2015/1928 Zulu

The dawn of the apocalypse started like any average day in the neighborhood. I got up, worked out, and ate breakfast with my family.  Then I got in my truck and came into the office, got my usual cup of coffee, sat at my desk and started to work.  I didn’t have too much or too little to do today.  It was an average day.  The XO had sent me a couple of emails with a few things to take care of while he was gone TAD for the week.  So being the good Lieutenant that I am, I jumped right on it and started to knock out his list. 

Like most disasters, you have a tendency to overlook the small things.  What happened, you ask?  My dive buddy Lt. Harman came in and sat down in front of my desk.  When he did this, I realized, the chairs I’d moved out of my office were back.  I should have known then my day was about to go straight to hell, but I missed the sign and kept right on going. 

The first sign of the apocalypse…

“Have you been on Facebook today?” 

“No, I’ve been busy.  Working.” 

“You have got to be kidding me!  You need to get on there now and see what’s happened.” 

“I don’t have time for that shit right now.  Cobra left me a list from hell to get done while he’s gone.  I’ve jumped on that.  I’ll get on Facebook later.” 

“Man, you really need to see what’s happening!”  Shaq insisted.

“Not now—“

“Boy, what the fuck did you do?” 

The second sign of the apocalypse…

“Come back with that Master Chief?  I just got here.” 

“Have you seen Twitter and Facebook, numb nuts!”

“No Master Chief, I’m busy.  Working.” 

“What the fuck good are you Combat Systems Department Head?  Isn’t that what you’re supposed to be doing?” 

“Master Chief, the XO left me a list I’m working through.  It’s long and tedious, and none of it looks like anything I can put off.  Since the captain probably gave him most of this list, I figure that ought to go to the top of my to-do list.” 

Master Chief backed up and gave me a wild almost crazy-ass look.  I knew the shit was about to hit the fan but before it did …

The third sign of the apocalypse…  

They say that bad news travels in threes, and today it certainly did.  A notification popped up in my email.  It was an alert notifying me of any ping words that showed up in Bella’s email.  Of course the information I was looking for related to Bella’s new release, Tightrope.  I opened the notification and read the following: 

Hello Bella,Thank you for sending your series sequel, Tightrope [Black Ops Brotherhood 6]. We would like to publish it. We have set the projected electronic publication date for May/June 2015.

I think I blacked out for a minute because a sharp sting to my face woke me up.  Shaq and Master Chief were both around me. Master Chief looked worried and had backed up.  Shaq was shaking me.

               

“Wake up!  What the hell happened to you?” 

“Huh?” 

“You got all pale and limp.  Master Chief had to slap the shit of out of you to bring back.  You okay, man?” 

I opened my mouth and flexed my jaw, “What the fuck did you hit me with, Master Chief? A brick?” 

“It was just a slap,” Master Chief scoffed, “you scared the crap out of me, boy, I thought you’d quit breathing, I was trying to help.”

“You do know that’s striking an officer and that’s a Captain’s Mast offense, Article 15.”    

 “Won’t be the first time,” Master Chief shrugged, “ I think the last one I had involved your captain and he was standing next to me, getting his ass chewed.”

“So what happened?”  Shaq asked. 

“Nothing.  I really need to get on this list Cobra left me.”  

“You really need to check out Facebook,” Shaq said resuming his seat.

“Fine …” 

I opened my browser and logged into one of my many Facebook accounts.  One of which is a member of Bella’s so called BlackOps Babes Street Team.  When I got to the news feed I saw a whole bunch of posts from all kinds of people.  All of them had snippets from books one through five of the BlackOps Brotherhood.  I saw the book covers, caught a few lines of the story and then I saw …  

The final sign of the apocalypse…  

                   Babes: Today is ‪#‎LTDAN‬‬‬‬ day... Let's get his attention and hashtag his

                   name all day …

Every ounce of blood in my body drained to my feet.  Was she serious?  

H-o-l-y S-h-i-t o-n a S-h-i-n-g-l-e…. #LTDAN was trending on Facebook, Twitter and Google!  

Of all the hell she’d inflicted on our unit.  This had to top them all.  And, why me?  Somewhere in the distance I heard.  

“I think it happened again.”  

“Should slap the shit out of him, again?”  

“Maybe …”  

“Okay, but remember, if you have to testify at my Court Marshal, I did it out of love and concern.”  

“Maybe, you ought to knock him out this time.  Then we’ll both leave.”  

“Don’t you fucking dare!”  I snarled, “I heard you.  And I’m still here.  Get out.  Get out of my office.  Now!”  

When I opened my eyes my office was empty.  Even Master Chief knew better than to screw with me when I’m genuinely pissed off.  I sat staring at the news feed as it filled up with #LTDAN posts for I don’t know how long.  I had to do something to stop her and stop the publication of this book and I had less than six weeks to do it.  

I’ll get you Bella and your little Babes, too.  

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